By Charles Wheelan
Modeled on Charles Wheelan’s 2011 category Day Speech at Dartmouth university, this number of refreshingly sincere recommendation and observations is the antidote to these cotton-candy platitudes which are all too popular to a person who’s ever worn a mortarboard. Armed with a PhD in public coverage, decades of expertise in social technological know-how study, and—perhaps such a lot important—good-natured humor, Wheelan deals up 10½ head-turning aphorisms on happiness and luck that anybody staring down the barrel of commencement must listen yet most likely hasn’t heard but. Celebrated New Yorker cartoonist Peter Steiner provides a slightly of caprice together with his irreverent illustrations sprinkled all through.
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Extra info for 10 ½ Things No Commencement Speaker Has Ever Said
My snail secreted a special kind of slime for locomotion, called pedal mucus, over which it traveled.
This brought a sense of connection and contentment, yet was a striking reminder of how entirely cut off I was from the most basic activities of life. 6. TIME AND TERRITORY The velocity of the ill, however, is like that of the snail. — EMILY DICKINSON, in a letter to Charles H. Clark, April 1886 INCHES FROM MY bed and from each other stood the terrarium and a clock. While life in the terrarium flourished, time ticked away its seconds. But the relationship between time and the snail confused me. The snail would make its way through the terrarium while the hands of the clock hardly moved—so I often thought the snail traveled faster than time.
That moment was always full of pure, sweet, uncontrollable hope. I did not ask for this hope to come; I did not even want it, for it trailed disappointment in its wake. Yet there it was, hovering within me—hope that my illness had vanished with the night and my health had returned magically with daybreak. But that moment always passed, my eyes opened, and reality flooded in; nothing had changed at all. Then I thought of the snail. I’d look for the tiny, earth-colored creature. Usually it was back up in the flowerpot asleep, its familiar shape reminding me that I wasn’t alone.
10 ½ Things No Commencement Speaker Has Ever Said by Charles Wheelan